Caught in the Middle

I am caught in the middle.  The middle between a mother and her son.  I love my mother in law.  Kevin’s mom has been a Godsend to us.  Caring for Lincoln while I work, buying food and diapers, giving us money to keep us afloat.  She is an amazing friend and confidant.  Nobody else really truly understands what is it is like living with and caring for Kevin but me and her.  However, we are two different people from two different worlds.  She is Kevin’s mom, I am Kevin’s wife.  Different roles, different lives, different mindsets.  Kevin’s disability affects us differently because of that.  It took me a long time to understand and except Kevin’s disability and what he needs or wants from me.  I still screw up and make mistakes, but I am still learning.  There is no cure for RSD.  I have accepted Kevin is and will always be disabled.  But we need to move on and “learn to walk” again.  Maybe I have come to terms with that easier than Kevin’s mom because it is a necessity for me.  It doesn’t do Kevin or Lincoln any good to ignore the disability or think this will all go away some day.  This is our life now.  We will make the most of it.  You might think I am strange to say this, but I feel we are blessed that God chose us to have this happen to.  He must have chosen us for a reason.  We have already reaped benefits and blessings from it.  The love and support from friends and family is overwhelming.  Can’t look at what has been lost; have to look at what has been gained.  There is still more to gain.  My wish is that Kevin and his mom can work together, understand each other better, and be there for each other.  They love each other that are obvious.  But the hurt and sadness between them needs to go away.  I know it kills her to see her son in pain.  I couldn’t imagine seeing Lincoln suffer like she sees her son suffer.  We are all dealing with this RSD in our own ways.  And there isn’t a wrong or right way.  We just all need to support each other.