My son Lincoln wakes me up on the weekends by saying “it is waking up time mommy”. Yesterday in church during the homily, I found my mind wandering to other things than what the gospel was about. Lincoln
I have been away from my blog for awhile all caught up in my crazed life. Kevin’s RSD, our recent move and the holidays. I have had time to decompress and really reflect on my life and how fortunate I am. God gave me the good things and the bad things so I could experience life fully. It is hard to watch Kevin suffer in pain daily, but to be witness to his strength is amazing. And I get the opportunity to show my strength and my support. Those are blessings too.
In times of crisis people always come to help and offer prayers. But when it is a chronic illness that goes on forever, never goes away, some people forget and fall away. Then when you give a window into your life, like the Chicago Tribune article and video, some people pull away, not knowing what to say or do. They treat you differently because they don’t want to upset you, or burden you with anything else because “you got enough going on”. You become that elephant in the room.
It is waking up time for everyone in my life. Kevin is disabled with RSD. He will always be disabled. It isn’t going away or going to get better. Please don’t pull away or avoid or be afraid of what to say or do. I need all of you in my life now more than ever. I want to be there for you in your good times and in your bad.
I learned through my trials that friends start to drop away after about a year to two year - for various reasons, all their own, and as where I know most of them I tend to not disparage the endeavor of others. This is partially why I was so happy to strengthen my connection to Kevin when I did, We need friends who can be constantly compassionate and willfully understand that there are some times and things that we simply cannot control or make more tolerable - except by their companionship, and ability to see past the restriction of living.
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